A new hope
by Chitilada
Summary: What do you do when destiny makes a fatal mistake? How do you deal with it? "But actually it s not their fault." - "It is mine!"   No slash!


**Some time ago, I started having the idea about writing this two-shot, when I heard one particular song. I know it sounds weird... but that song was just fitting, so I decided to give it a try and this is what I came up with. :)**

**Title: A new hope**

**Characters: Merlin/Arthur**

**Catgory: Drama/Tragedy**

**Rating: K+**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any characters mentioned, the BBC does.**

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It was one of those days where I wished, that everything had never turned out the way it had. And it was one of those days where I realised that not everything foretold had to come to pass. Knowing that even destiny made mistakes was on the one hand calming but on the other hand confusing. In my case: Neither of these were true.

With a quick movement I wrapped my green cloak closer around me, preventing the biting cold to reach my skin. Nevertheless I couldn't stop shivering, as a gust of freezing air hit me, tousling my hair and blowing through the dark mane of my gelding. It huffed slightly, but wasn't deterred and continued to trudge up the lonely path. I looked at the saddle bags to where I had tied a longish bundle and made sure that it was safely at its place before I gave it the command to gallop.

It was still early morning when suddenly the sun broke through the heavy blanket of clouds and allowed the sun rays to bath the landscapes, with all its hills and meadows, in bright light. I would have enjoyed the sight, if my journey was not of that great importance. So I turned my eyes away and kicked the gelding into a fast canter again, leading it towards the woods. Most of the time I had to concentrate on my way to avoid my horse from tripping on the uneven ground, but at least it didn't give me much space to dwell on thoughts, which definitely would have tossed me back into the dark hole of despair, I had just recently climbed out of.

Some when around midday I finally arrived at my destination, dismounted and tethered the horse to a nearby standing tree before my hand hesitantly reached for the bundle at the saddle. For a second I gently rested my fingers on it, asking myself the hundredth time, if this was really the right thing to do. I came to the conclusion that it was the one and only way and quickly unfastened it. With my heart beating hardly against my chest I began to walk over the clearing, looking over my shoulder every now and then. I was sure that no one had followed my way, yet I felt as if someone was watching me. Probably I already suffered from paranoia!

Now there were only a few steps left between me and the top of the green hill where I was heading for. The closer I got, the more the fear grew in me. It was almost like drowning in a feeling of trepidation, as I made the last step up the incline.

Somehow I had the strength to open my eyes again, which I had squeezed shut, in case I couldn't handle the sight, and found myself facing a large marble tombstone, glistening in the bright sunlight.

"Hey, Arthur." I whispered.

Suddenly my knees failed to support my weight any longer and I slowly sank to the ground.

A depressing silence filled the place and I noticed that I was trembling. Perhaps because of the cold, as the sun had hidden behind the clouds again, but more probable because of something else. I failed to describe that 'something'. I only knew that it made me feel uncomfortable and more alone in this world than I had ever felt. Hesitantly I began to survey the grave stone, which stood there at the top of the hill under a big oak tree like the King of the forest, observingly watching over his subjects. The tombstone was designed as Arthur would have liked it. Plain, yet it radiated dignity. It was worth a King´s.

"I know I should have come earlier..." I mumbled more to myself than to the tombstone, regret swinging in my voice. "But I just couldn´t. Everything has changed since... you are gone."

I took a deep breath at the thought of Camelot, now tainted with sadness and ruled by a broken King, who lost everything that was dear to him.

"Your father makes the knights responsible for what happened. He says, they should have looked out for you better. But actually it´s not their fault."

Another deep sigh escaped my lips before I finally found the strength to continue.

"It is mine!"

Suddenly a gust of cool air blew into my face and another caused the leaves of the oak tree above me to rustle, as though responding to my confession.

"I should never have left you alone... one of the bandits attacked me and I was distracted for a moment. I swear, it was only a moment. When I saw you were in difficulties and ran back to you, it was already too late. Believe me when I tell you, that I´ve tried everything in my power to save you. But the wound was just too deep."

The memories of that very day that should change everything swept over me like a wave and I tried my best to keep a clear head and to fight against the upcoming tears that started to slowly blur my sight.

"You know, it wasn´t supposed to end like this! I mean, we had a destiny together, hadn´t we? Your name should have survived centuries as you were the one who was destined to bring Albion its long-desired peace ... and it was my job to make sure of that. I only had this one job and... I failed it."

My voice broke at the last few words as the emotions finally overwhelmed me.

"I am... so sorry, Arthur!" I whispered and wiped away the tears, that had begun to stream down my face uncontrollably.

"But there is more. Something I haven´t told you, yet, … something I was too weak to admit. I was afraid of how you would react."

I truly regretted that I had never found the courage to tell him about his destiny earlier. Still, he had a right to know now.

"When you would have become King, a new era would have begun. A time where magic would not be feared as the instrument of evil but seen as a gift, used only for good. You were the hope my kin has waited for such a long time!"

I stopped for a short moment, realising the real impact of my failure.

"So it´s not only you I have abandoned, but also my people who have built all their hopes on us. Now it seems as if their hopes have been for nothing."

I slowly lowered my head. I couldn´t stand the sight of his name, carefully engraved on the tombstone, any more. Too heavy was the guilt weighing down on my shoulders.

After what seemed like an eternity, I looked up again, something catching my eye in the process.

"Oh,... I´ve totally forgotten about that."

I didn´t even remember having lain the longish bundle in the grass next to me. I gently picked it up and started to slowly unwrapping the fabric around it.

"It was forged in a dragon´s breath."

…

**Do you want me to continue? Reviews and criticism appreciated! Please note that I am not a native English speaker, so I am sorry for all possible mistakes and I hope you can forgive me :)**


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